Later this week: Spencer Gifts

Holy shit! Where else in the mall can you buy a "World's Best Dad" mug and a 12 inch ceramic ding dong?
More to come.....

Claire's Botuique

I remember that as a young man going into a Claire's was as close to cross dressing as a young man could get without slipping into a pair of Hanes control tops. All those bright day glow scrunchies, cheap perfumes and gold plated chains would make any preteen weak in the knees. Half of you wants to get pierced while the other half wants to try out single stitched pleather handbags. Hooker or Princess, you have options here.

Rumor has it that some teens just get pregnant by stepping foot inside and I believe it. Others just get an earlobe infection

Late 80's Dodge Caravans

Today it dawned on me that ratty late 80's Dodge Caravans make me feel really uncomfortable. Like the one you saw in the Wal-mart parking lot today. The one no longer owned by a family but some single 40 something looking to score some rare and colorful tetras for his new 50 gallon fish tank

If there were some baby seats in the back or even seats at all it wouldn't feel so strange but there is not and thus it does. I am sure he could have picked up an aging Ford Escort or rotted out Corolla, he had options at one point. However, he went right for the shit brown rusted out 1988 Dodge Caravan with stained velor seats and manual windows. Maybe it was a lifestyle choice. He thought of all the used car parts and broken toys he could haul to the flea market and with a little wash and wax she might be something special.

Unfortunately, he never thought of the rest of us and how we might feel about it.